Friday, December 27, 2013

Chapter 3- The worst day Europe had to give.

By morning, I was not ready to leave Amsterdam. I was wishing we had chosen to stay longer. Part of it was laziness. Our apartment was so cozy. But the other part was I still had a craving for the city. I only got a small taste and I wanted more of the funky flavor Amsterdam was. We had a very long bus ride ahead of us to Paris. 7 hours. My past experiences with the US Greyhound bus system set a very low standard of expectation for the trip. If we had planned earlier, like most people, we would have been able to ride the fast train. But saving almost 200 euros felt like justification enough so we didn't complain about unknown terrors. We were completely confused about how to get to the bus depot, but we tend to have this "it will be ok" philosophy which made us believe we would figure it out as we traveled. Step one was to return our apartment keys and the bikes and head toward Central Station. Step two would reveal itself somewhere along the way- either in the form of an "aha moment" or a big mistake. We were leaving early enough to allow for the latter of the two. We rang the bell of our "landlord" to return our keys. She had just as much energy and was just as talkative as the first time we met her (I concluded it wasn't my exhaustion from earlier; she really was this bubbly all the time). She asked about our stay and where we went and what we had the time for. She said multiple times we should have stayed longer and we full heartily agreed. She asked where we were going next and if we knew where to catch our bus. We told her we didn't quite know, but had the plans to figure it out. She laughed as if that was a preposterous plan and invited us in so she could direct us properly. She led us into her flat as if we were friends. Her son, about 6 I would say, was quietly playing with a train set on the floor of their living room. Their flat was beautiful. Modern, white decor accenting the old charms of original hardwood flooring and large picture windows with thick elaborately carved molding. It looked and felt just like something you see in a movie. Perfectly matched furniture, clean, ideal, and if I don't sound too cliche, "European". We gave her the address of the bus depot and she had to rack her brain for a minute or so trying to see if she could recall from memory where that would be. She couldn't. She whipped out a map from the wall length, ceiling height book shelf. She began scouring the map as if this were her own route. You could tell it was driving her crazy that she couldn't figure out where this bus depot was hiding. She admitting this was becoming quite the mission, and she wasn't going to give up. The doorbell rang, so she had to excuse herself for a moment. She informed us some repairmen were coming so she needed to show them what needed to be done. We sat awkwardly in her dining room while we waited. The book shelf was an easy thing to study without being intrusive. She spoke English and Dutch, maybe other languages too. She had quite a bit of philosophy type books and what looked to be self-help ones too. Books that looked like classic reads. Nothing trendy or shallow, so it seemed. A lot of them were in Dutch, so I could be wrong. But by the spines, the letter, the book covers, they all appeared to be quite the deep read. It made me appreciate her more. She seemed well educated and genuine. It took her quite some time, and we were getting nervous about the nearing departure time since we still didn't have a direction to go. She came hopping down the stairs waving a paper. "I found it! I had to cheat and use Google, because it's out in the middle of nowhere!" She showed us the directions she printed- all in Dutch. "How does that look? Do you understand where you need to go?" I didn't want to admit it was still so confusing, so I said yes. She probably sensed the need for clarification, or she was just one of those people that liked to be doubly sure- so she explained it step by step anyway. Thankfully. It was an easy trip. Hop the metro, head to Central Station, catch a city bus, and head all the way to the edge of Amsterdam. Once the city stopped looking like anything we had seen downtown, we would know we were nearing the bus depot. It was bare out by the bus depot. No exciting buildings, no canals or bikes. There were some large industry buildings, freight train loading areas, desolate plains. I think I remembered some modern wind mills, but I can't seem to clearly recall now. The bus depot had one little "check in" booth the size of a Dutch Bros coffee stand. The bus depot itself was just a giant parking lot with a ton of buses parked sporadically. There were signs that pointed in directions to different lots and different zones. We headed toward our "zone" and realized we were about an hour early. We waited a lot on the trip. Waiting for transportation, that is. We couldn't afford to risk being late, that would mess up quite a string of things. There were benches to sit on, outside. We sat and waited like the others who had arrived before us. After about a half hour, a man dressed in what we could assume was a uniform signifying he was our bus driver, walked up to our waiting area. He was very tall. Husky. Long curly hair to the middle of his back. Dark sunglasses sitting on a broad face. Smoking a cigarette, drinking coffee (or at least, what I hoped was coffee). He strongly reminded me of Penn Jillette or maybe Meatloaf. He waited right along with us until exactly 12 when he was scheduled to allow us on the bus.Not a minute before. As we waited for the clearance to board the bus, a van pulled up. 3 middle eastern men unloaded a giant box very carefully. They waddled unsteadily to a bench behind us to the far left, away from our peripheral vision. It would be too obvious if we turned around to watch what more was happening. The box was made of slats of wood. You could slightly see between the slats, revealing an overflowing amount of pink bubble wrap. The kind with the largest of bubbles. The kind you want to lay all about the floor to dance upon creating a unique beat of clicks and pops. Whatever was in that box was mighty fragile and mighty heavy. 1 of the men left the other two waited to board the bus. We exchanged some whispers both agreeing it would be unnerving if they were on our bus. Sure, you can accuse me of a bit of racial profiling, I don't even feel bad about it. The two men didn't smile, at least the glances I did catch of them, I never saw a soft facial expression. We lost interest in our dramatic assumptions and began chatting quieting to each other, Chris and I. As we talked, one of the men began to wander slowly in our direction, stopping directly behind us. He lit a cigarette and hovered closely for what seemed forever. Chris motioned for me to stop talking- I assumed it was because I was speaking in English. I muttered a few sentences in french and he seemed slightly relieved. We sat quietly (because I know very little French and Chris even less- so no conversation could be had). The man remained behind us. Not moving. His buddy yelled something to him in a harsh tone and he wandered back to their big box. No luggage, just the big box. Meatloaf Penn signaled we could begin loading up. We snatched up our bags as quickly as possible. It's not a graceful process for me to pick up my pack and go. It's an awkward ordeal of heaving and hoeing and throwing weight to one side to balance while I try to find the arm hole of my bag while keeping my coat from bunching up under the pack. I wasn't quick. It had to have been humorous. And I hated it. Each and every of the 500 times I had to do it, it was quite the commotion. Sometimes the finger of my glove would get caught somewhere and it would take tugging and uncanny bends of my arms to re-situate enough to get it unstuck with my hand still in it. Backpacking was a romantic notion. It sounded unconventional and appealing in the forefront, but in reality, it was quite the nuisance. I would have still called what we did "backpacking" even if we had used more mobile luggage such as rolling suitcases. The concept of backpacking was more about hopping from place to place with spontaneity rather than the actual act of carrying a stupid back pack. But something about my backpack made me feel less of a tourist and more tough, I suppose. Even under all that weight, after all the jumping and twisting I had to do to put it on, I felt rugged. Adventurous. We put our packs under the bus and boarded. The bus was very nice and pretty spacious. The seats were comfy and we even had a little tray in front of us as well as foot rests. No greyhound bus was even close to this cush. Maybe this bus ride wouldn't be so bad after all. We sat in the seats next to the bathroom, which meant we had more room for our legs to stretch out. The bathroom was actually "downstairs". This bus was a bit of a double decker. We sat above, the driver sat below with a few rows of seats and then the bathroom was midway through the bus. It took about 5 stairs to reach the little cubbyhole water closet. It was small, but adequate. Similar to an airplane bathroom. We got settled in and began staring back at our original concern. That box and its owners. There was only one guy with the box now. His buddy seemed to have disappeared. Chris said he would be more nervous if only 1 of the original 3 boarded. I spoke the only bit of logic I could think of "A bus to Paris with mostly French and Dutch people can NOT be the target of anything more than some road rage at worst. I'm sure whatever they are doing, it's fine. Worst case scenario, they are transporting something less than legal to be used in a better fashion rather than a bus en-route to Paris." We both knew we were still interested in how this suspicious thing would play out. The single guy carried that giant box from where he had been standing toward the bus. I can only assume what happened next. There was quite a bit of chatter- in a language I didn't understand. Back and forth- questions and answers- you could tell by the fluctuations in tone. More chatter with stronger tones. And... I don't think they ended up getting on the bus. I never saw them the rest of the trip. Maybe I did and just didn't recognize them without their cryptic box. But I'm fairly, at least partially, certain they didn't end up riding. We find it slightly funny now. Our concern. Our attention to try and fill in the blanks to a possibly suspicious but probably not suspicious situation. On our trip, we had an Irish priest tell us that he felt like Americans were so paranoid. And, this moment, proved it. We are. With or without reason, we just are. Our airports prove it too. We traveled by train, bus, boat and plane- and never encountered the pat down force search in which we experienced in the American airports. We were traveling from country to country, but they didn't seem to care. They didn't even stamp my passport in every country. (Which honestly was a bit disappointing because I was really hoping to rough that crisp new document up a bit while trekking all over Europe. Unfortunately, I think I got a total of 3 stamps out of the 6 countries we traversed.) The bus began to move and we felt the excitement of heading to a new place rise up in our bellies. Although that could have also just been hunger left lingering in the bottom of our stomachs from a skimpy hasty breakfast. We listened intently to understand where the next stop would be. We had been so focused on getting to the obscure location of the bus park that we didn't pack water or lunch for the trip. We had had a light breakfast of the remains from what we purchased at the grocery store, but it was just some meats and cheese and crackers. We couldn't make out much of the jumbled information broadcast over the crackly intercom. Hopefully, somewhere in his mumbling between French and English he was saying we would have a break along the route. The ride itself wasn't bad. We read. We played on our phones. We talked. We looked out the window at the scenery. We slept. Then we looked at the time- only 2 hours had passed. Oy. I decided to use the restroom. Even though I hadn't had anything to drink. It was a way of passing time I suppose, a way to stretch my legs, a way to change scenery. I don't know. Using the bathroom in a moving bus takes a bit of balance, which I don't have. The bus jerked and swayed and bumped and turned sharply. It was...entertaining. The toilet paper was near empty. Thankfully, because I was just killing time and using this as an excuse to get up out of my seat, I barely needed any (too much information?). But I knew, on a trip lasting 5 more hours, the remaining 7 squares were NOT going to last. I made my way up the stairs from the little "break room" and back to my seat. A guy went in after me. When he was finished, he had some trouble closing the door. He finally just slammed it shut and moved along. A girl came shortly after. I wanted to warn her of the possibility there was no toilet paper, but I didn't. Instead, she couldn't open the door. She tried and tried. I decided to use this moment as excuse #2 to get up out of my seat. I tried to open the door too and couldn't. I'm guessing the door trouble the gentlemen before us had was--- he locked it! She seemed defeated like any girl would if she really had to go and couldn't. I felt bad for her. But she just returned to her seat. I wanted to suggest she go ask the driver for a key, but I worried she didn't speak English. Eh, it probably saved her from the problem she would have encountered with the toilet paper anyway. I figured, when we stopped I would mention something to the driver. (about the locked door and the toilet paper- hoping I wouldn't be blamed for either). Hour 3.5 came right about Brussels, Belgium. We were stopping there to pick up more travelers. I sighed a big breath of relief for the upcoming break. We wove in and out of interesting buildings, cars, streets and people sewing deeper and deeper into the city. Looking at a new place, trying to soak in as much of the cityscape as possible as the bus sped along took my mind off my ever growing desire for food and water and the opportunity to stretch my legs. We arrived at the "bus station" which looked more like a mall entrance. There were great looking food places all around. The first announcement to come over the faulty intercom system was, DO NOT GET OFF THE BUS- WE ARE PICKING UP PASSENGERS AT THIS TIME ONLY. A few other things were muttered about a future stop and where our break would take place. I slightly panicked, but I reasoned that we would still get our break. No one is that heartless to force riders to stay put for more than 4 hours, right? Passengers loaded onto the bus, completely filling every seat. The atmosphere instantly changed from a quiet, comfortable ride, to a packed, stuffy one. I could smell the rain from their wet coats, hair and scarves. It made the once clean, circulating air seem so--- dense and stifling. Before, the bus had over half the seats empty. Now every single one was occupied. More than ever, I was wanting this break. I was done gazing with the hour introduction to Brussels. I wanted off the bus. I wanted to eat. I wanted water. But- to my dismay as quickly as the bus loaded, the bus began to depart. I was hoping there was maybe a planned stop just down the road, you know, someplace less crowded, less busy. I figured that was smart of the driver to take us to a less congested area to take a break. I decided I would be a bit more patient to let the driver do his deal. He knew what we was doing, regardless of what his mess of hair said about him. I tried to let the thought go, to just wait without waiting. I tried to think about things OTHER than food and water. Half hour passed. Then an hour. We had now been on the bus for 5 hours with no water and no food and a locked bathroom door with a dangerously low toilet paper supply. I figured maybe the driver was going to stop at a "midway" point between the last stop and our final stop, that seemed reasonable, I suppose. We kept busing along. We cruised quickly, zipping in and out of traffic as if we were a just another car. If I hadn’t been so annoyed with this heartless Meatloaf guy I would have given him props for his dexterity in driving. I had actually noticed in all the buses we rode thus far, the drivers were, in my mind, extremely talented. They whipped around tight little corners, bolted down one lane width streets, and parked as if they were no bigger than a fiat. MULTIPLE times I was certain we would hit a pole or at least jump the curb as the driver cut in between items I myself would have been nervous to navigate with just my car. They drove dangerously close to other vehicles without a flinch. They were fast and precise. None of the words I am using currently would describe any of my bus experiences in the States. Precise. Bolt. Whip. Dexterity. Nope. These words describe the geometric and physics masterminds that have ever so perfectly calculated each angle and curve along with their speed. They seemed to know the dimensions of their big old bus better than I know the dimensions of my big old hips. After 28 years of knowing my body, I still have trouble clearing corners without a massive hit and run collision. We pulled off the main interstate and started driving down a winding side road. It headed toward a rest area. I felt some glee rising up. I felt a bit of joy starting to tickle my pallet. Water! Maybe even food! A bathroom with enough toilet paper for all! Or at least most! We drove by the rest area. My overly optimistic mind said “don’t worry, he’s taking you to a better place. That rest area looked gross, and vending-machine-less. Just you wait. Just you wait to see how smart this bus driver is.” I didn’t get to see the smarts of the bus driver. Ever again. IN FACT, that bus driver was taking a detour to some hotel, where he in turn got off and traded with a different driver. That was it. Just a captain's trade off. Penn was off to his comfy hotel and a new guy, looking exactly opposite of him was taking over. The two greeted each other as if they were brothers. They laughed. Hugged. Talked. Said hellos and goodbyes like this was a joy ride. The new, short, skinny driver got on the bus to assume business as usual. And that was that. We headed back to the interstate as if stopping hadn’t even crossed the mind of either driver. Maybe I was supposed to push some sort of button. Maybe someone was supposed to ask to have the privilege to a break from the cramped ride. Maybe the driver assumed no one wanted one. Maybe, just maybe, it was somewhere on the booking website that I was supposed to plan sufficiently for a long bus ride and that is why everyone else seemed to have ample fluids and snacks to keep them happy. Well, I finally gave up on the idea of stopping. I resigned to journaling and interspersing a few games of Plague between thoughts. I’m a viral and bacterial champion, so unfortunately, killing off the population wasn’t as exciting as when I first started the game. (If you have no idea to what I’m referring, look up Plague Inc on Google and you will realize I’m not a terrorist… mostly.)
I would be lying if the rest of the trip just floated on by after I gave in to the fact that we would not be stopping until our final destination. We reached the very outskirts of Paris long after night had blackened the sky. We were greeted with the glow of a million taillights in the worst traffic jam I’d seen since an incident on I5 in 2008. (That incident was memorable for it’s multitude of uncomfy factors as well.) Of course traffic would make this already unpleasant trip longer. We weren’t anxious to get anywhere. (Yes, we were) We had the patience to spare. (No, we didn’t!) As I’ve mentioned many times, Europe is just different than America. Driving, eating, patience, customer service, daily interactions. All different. Well, in this moment, I didn’t feel like it was different. I felt like I was back at home, in some unnecessary, unexplainable waste of time with no feelings of magic or peace. Just the inability to continue on. Prevented from moving forward. Anxious to get to where we were headed, even though we were on no schedule other than our own- put in place by circumstantial discomforts. I didn’t like that mixture of internal responses rising up in me- impatient expectation sprinkled all over discontent. Had I not been learning anything? Was I already throwing what I loved about this foreign land out the window? Regardless of all that was happening, there was reason to rest. There was reason to be patient. There was reason for positive thoughts and a boost of stamina to hang in there til the end. I had the opportunity to be the “different” I say the people of this place are- and I sure was NOT taking it. That little mental pep talk helped calm me down. Sure, I had justification for my annoyance. But who cares about whether the emotion is justified or not! I don’t want to BE what I dislike. And I dislike impatient, demanding people. I dislike people who can’t make the best of a poor situation. I dislike complaining. So, I made a point, in my brain, to consciously move away from the tendencies of old and try a new reaction on for size. I would get there when I got there. I would look out the window and study the city lights, because they were so beautiful. I would look at my husband and get all sentimental- because- WE. ARE. IN. PARIS (at least I was pretty sure we were on the edge of the magical city). I would look into the windows of the stopped cars beside us, study the people within. (I don’t care if that’s considered creepy. I do it.) Maybe I would rest my eyes. Maybe I would journal more. Maybe...I would just enjoy. I’m in Europe for Pete’s sake! You can’t get much luckier. The stop and go traffic carried on. And on. And on. We sat on the same road for as long as I can remember. Rain pouring. Stomach growling. Mouth watering. Time ticking. I kept checking the time (which gave away I still had a skosh of nagging impatience resting upon my shoulders). I remember thinking when the clock struck 7, “We could have been deboarding right now.” I wondered how far we actually were from the bus station. It would have been helpful had the driver given an update or some sort of blip of information about our estimated time of arrival. Even our distance TO arrival would have been helpful. For all I knew, I could have just ASSUMED this was Paris and been way off. Then again that update, that smidgen of information, was craved by the very emotion I was trying to remove from myself. I wanted to really understand the meaning of the word “embrace”. There was nothing I could do to alter this circumstance, so the only altering needed to be done was on my perspective. No one else seemed to be squirming with this impatience thing. Then again, no other Americans were aboard. At some point you may get sick of the comparisons. American versus European. I can understand that might get old. But this trip was to explore another culture. Comparison is part of observation. Comparison is part of understanding. And comparison, ultimately, is part of growing. Good from bad. Old from new. American culture is, in my opinion, consumed with some seriously mixed up priorities. I carry that culture within me because that is where I am from. But as I grow, I try to shed that. I try to remove what I dislike about where I am from to become a being that is from everywhere. Influenced, but not completely shaped by, where I live. Influenced, but not completely shaped by, what I’ve experienced. Influenced, but not completely shaped by ANYTHING other than my own artistic rendition of it all. The number one difference I notice everywhere is there is no hurry or at least the irritated hurry. There is no hustle bustle in Europe like there is in America. They take life as it is- embrace. This bus trip made me wrestle with that concept. Ideally, I’d say, I’m not a part of that cultural ideology. Rush, rush, rush. Time is money. But, this bus trip is revealing I AM part of that group of movers, rushers, bustlers and hustlers. No better place to battle a life concept than in a magical land, right? So I don’t drag this part of the story on and make it as equally long and dreadful as the actual bus trip, I will skip to the arriving part. We got there. Safe. Still alive. Undamaged in any way. (This is what saving 200 euros looks like- priceless life lessons.) We got off the bus, trying to move with the crowd, but struggling with limbs that felt more like rubber than skin and bone. Wobbling along gathering our packs and our sense of “what next”, we searched for our next mode of transportation. Chris looked at his gps and commented the hotel was only about a mile and a half away. We could walk that- easy. We didn’t have the motivation to walk that, though. Along the street, dozens of yellow and black cabbies were parked waiting for customers. They likely were going to charge us more than the car ride was worth, but never had we been more eager to spend an unnecessary amount of money than that moment. The first cab driver tried to ignore Chris’ English. He sat in his car, staring straight ahead. Chris cleared his throat and spoke loud enough that the man couldn’t ignore him, he looked at Chris unimpressed. He uttered a short “NO”. He didn’t even look at our gps for the address. He looked away, and that was our cue to move on. The next cab driver responded immediately with “No English”. He didn’t take the time to examine the address on the gps either. I can’t remember the 3rd cabbie’s response, but it was a negative one. All three made it very clear they were uninterested in helping someone who spoke English. Interesting when the table is turned, when YOU’RE the odd one out and being discriminated against. I have no entitlement to their help or liking. I don’t even mind if they care for us or not. But I suppose I was taken back by the disregard for us because of the language we spoke. Because we were “foreigners”. I’ve never really had that happen before. I’m white. But now, I understand. My husband has tried to explain it before. He’s not white. I always thought he just had a different perspective on things. But it never really sank in like that moment forced it to sink in. Hopefully, I remember that feeling for future references, though. I never want to treat another that way. If I have in the past, I regretted it in that moment. I toggled between frustration toward the snobby French and worry that walking was going to be our only option. I had something more predominant than my mind guiding me though. Despite the lack of water, I desperately needed a bathroom. Across the street from the massive bus parking lot and the French nationalist taxi cars there was a shopping mall. People were hustling more so out the doors, than in. I didn't care, I would find a bathroom open or closed. We walked with such determination, but it didn't distract me from the stares and glances I would catch.I felt frumpy, the looks made it worse. The mall was upscale. I saw the shoppers in their suits and black fashion and shiny shoes. They saw me in my wrinkled dress, my dusty stockings and boots and my drifter pack. Flat hair, smeared makeup. This contrast made me a tad more grumpy. We marched through the mall as if we knew where the bathrooms were, but we didn't. We just followed an outside wall hoping it would lead us to one. We were walking so far, it probably would have been more efficient to just head toward our hotel. But the decision had already been made. Going back now would just make everything feel more unsatisfying. We started following little signs posted at the ceiling of the walls with little men and little women on them. Safe to say those symbols are international ones. After many turns and corners and hallways, dodging hoards of traffic the opposite direction, we found the final cove to where the bathroom was built. A huge line of women clogged the entire entry way. Of course! I couldn't decide if I was going to wait out of rebellion or leave out of rebellion. I was so done with this day. Chris could tell I was defeated. He couldn't tell which way my defeat would run either. I'm certain he wanted to say, "Rosie, lets just give up and head to the hotel like we should have in the first place." He didn't say it. Even if there was truth in it, he kept quiet. That did us both a slight favor. My grumpiness would have responded poorly to the truth. The women were so crowded around the doorway I didn't notice the door had been closed the entire time until they all started to siphon out of the little cubby area. The door, in fact, was locked. Turns out, I would not be getting the bathroom with my original determination "open or closed". It was time for me to admit I was wasting our time. So I did admit it. Probably not in the nicest way one could admit a mistake, but I admitted it. Chris finally gave in to all the things wearing him down as well and showed off his grumpiness, too. I should have been more aware that he was also with out food, water, bathroom and other comforts all day too. It should have been obvious I wasn't the only one desperately trying to escape this rough day. The men's bathroom across the cove was also locked. Had it not been, I would have been in it. We began tracing the millions of steps we took in the wrong direction to get back on track to finding our hotel room. We bickered. About stupid things. How to walk. Where to turn. Who was more desperate for what. It was comical, really. The mini meltdown. I wasn't ready to say "I hate you, Paris." Not yet. But I felt the feeling begin to sneak in. Just a little bit of contempt for the dirty, snobby romance capitol. No love. My eyes were tearing up with the budding hate. I didn't want to cry. I wasn't going to. But Paris was being so mean. So heartless. I could have cried, and had good reason. But I didn't. The mall was at least 4 stories. 2 stories that led to bus stops and the underground metro. People were rushing in all directions leaving and finding the rest of their shopping crew and then leaving more. It was intense. People shoving and nearly crawling over escalators just to push their way through. The metro was a step in the right direction. Chris said there would be no faster way to be delivered to our hotel than the underground subway system. Figuring it out, that was the trick. We bought tickets. They were 3 euros a piece, I think. It took forever to get the machine to accept our credit card. At least 3 separate tries. Restarting everything from beginning to end. I wanted to bang on the damn machine but who knows what kind of consequences that held. We looked at the map and the routes ourselves. We wanted to decipher it on our own. But we couldn't. We asked the front desk lady for help. She seemed annoyed. She went and got another employee to answer our questions. While Chris talked I looked around. I had never been in an underground subway before. Everything was concrete grey. Dirt and litter everywhere. Peeling ads and safety posters were the only color. Some kiosks for ticket purchase. The front desk hidden behind layers of bullet proof glass (just a guess). 6 lanes of very narrow entry gates. They were all locked unless someone walked up, put their ticket in and then it let them pass. I noticed you could go right or left after the entry gate let you through. I didn't think to wonder why. Chris got the information he needed. We went through the skinny entry lane with some awkwardness from our bulky uncooperating packs. We went right. We went through many cement and brick hallways, stairways and corridors. Every so often you would see signs for other subway lines heading in opposing directions. The number 1 line exit to the left or the number 6 line exit to the right. We were looking for the number 2 line. The very last one, come to discover. The very orange lighting made the underground halls look dungeon-like. Interesting ad posters entertained us as we walked, waiting to reach our platform. We finally saw signs giving us hope we were near. We took the appropriate exit of stairs digging us deeper into the ground to meet our train. The platform was packed with people, lined where they assumed (or knew from experience) that the doors would be. In my head, I guessed this was like a bus stop. You get there and end up waiting a good 15 minutes (if not more) and the time of arrival was very dependent upon whether the transport was on time or not. I was quite wrong. The train came within a minute of standing. As I boarded, I noticed a lighted sign stating the next train would be arriving in 4 minutes. Convenient. We shuffled; small steps in keeping to the crowd of people all flowing into the small doorways. It was a quick ebb and flow. People spewed out, people rushed back on. For as many as there were going both directions, I would have thought it to be more…..clumsy. But it was smooth. Like an ocean wave. Forceful. Direct. Unified and graceful like a congealed liquid. In one second, out the other. Continuously spreading in all directions as time passed. I don’t know how we were lucky enough to find a seat. I sat, while Chris stood holding to a nearby pole. We were so tired our gaze latched to one area and we both found ourselves zoning out. The next stop came in less than a minute. The stop name was announced and a little light showed up on a map near the roof of the train to notate where you were in reference to where you had been and where you were headed. Our luck would have it- we were headed in the wrong direction. (Left is the direction we should have chosen at the entrance.)Our lazy daze was instantly broken, and we were back into hustled determination mode. Adrenaline pumped us out of the doors quickly and we began trying to figure out how to get to the other side of the tracks. We climbed the stairs leading us back into the cement tunnels (same scenery as before, just a different dot on the map). I couldn’t believe this day. I mean, it’s chalked up as an adventure in my memory now, but at the time- I was this close to fleeing Paris for good. But I couldn’t because I was too exhausted to get that rebellious. I was whipped into submission to just keep going- one step at a time. I can’t proudly boast that I had a good attitude the whole time. I can’t even really call myself a trooper. Because Chris will boldly pop that ideal bubble of nonsense. I was whiny. I was limping. I was grumpy. I was bossy. I really don’t like admitting all that. But then again, I don’t understand why not. I know better than to think people view me as this complacent, vanilla flavored sweetheart of a girl. I drug my whiny, limping, bossy derriere through the tunnels trying not to cry. One more thing gone wrong and I was definitely going to abandon my age and revert to a 5 year old. Tantrum. Tears. Tumultuous event. We figured out the configuration of the tunnel system after, of course, a few wrong turns and repaying to re-enter and ride (which later we found out we DIDN’T have to do, if we had known what we were doing). This time, the platform was quite empty. We waited the 3 minutes remaining, and boarded the next train as if the last 30 minutes hadn’t happened. We found our seats and tried to re-enter a state of daze. My blood pressure was lowering. I was in acceptance of everything for the moment. We were headed in the right direction, we were nearing our hotel- all would be well soon enough.
At the next stop (dejavu), a woman with a karaoke machine strapped to some sort of cart via duct tape boarded. Her contraption was accessorized with two red solo cups on each side of the cart (also duct taped). They read in sloppy sharpy- TIPS. She smiled a lot. She bent down to push a button and grabbed a microphone. The tinny twang of a terrible instrumental version of “La Bomba” started playing. I normally don’t get too involved in how strangers conduct themselves in public. Do whatever you want. The lady started singing. Loudly. She stood only about 10 feet from me. I wish I had had the ability to find this interesting form of begging comical. But in that moment, after all that had been stacking up in my day, my brain found no humor in this extremely annoying and unsolicited “entertainment”. I was tempted to provide her a tip to STOP. I wanted silence to lose myself in; not a hated, unforgettable tune. I feared the catchy song would take over my weakened and wearied mind and haunt me for hours. I never knew how much I hated the song La Bomba until that day. She finished her song and began walking around asking for tips as if she had done everyone a favor. Honestly, I am not usually this bitter about something so harmless. In the moment, I was close to questioning the universe as to whether this was some intentional and cruel trick being played on me. The irony of each little thing stacking up on top of the other to build this ferociously awful day couldn’t all be a coincidence, could it? I felt bad for ever complaining about a “bad day” prior. This easily topped the charts. No one gave the C rate singer or her solo red cups any reason to stay, so at the next stop, she deboarded. Tough crowd. I’m sure she planned to attempt her talents to a new audience in the next 4 minutes. Our stop came shortly thereafter. I could feel my frustration subsiding, because I had this theory that the worst was behind us. The rest was smooth sailing for this ship. We entered the city air from underground and I felt some accomplishment. We had about 10 blocks to hike. That was nothing. We were on the final stretch to what would be the most gratitude I’ve ever shown for a hotel in my life. The air was quite chilly now, it was pitch black. A few clouds lingered in the sky. Grey, seemingly glowing, wisps of odd shapes. One resembled a perfect heart. Not resembled in the way you sometimes see a shape that reminds you of a turtle or a dragon or whatever else you see in the sky. But resembled in the obvious way. It was a clear-cut heart. I pointed it out to Chris. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and squeezed me close. That moment was the most perfect of the day. Thankfully I had enough love in my own heart to embrace it. I felt the mounds of frustration, anxiety, and stress melting. My hunger and thirst were tolerable. My itchy nylons and aching feet were not dominating my thoughts. I could enjoy this final walk. We reached the hotel. I was near childlike giddy. The lobby to the hotel was beautiful. Shiny black counters and shiny white floors. Black and white and silver and purple everywhere. Purple chairs and a plush purple rug. The black walls with white crown molding looked so sleek. The hotel desk manager greeted us cheerfully. The first smile and light vocal tone we had heard in almost 12 hours(I absolutely do not count the karaoke beggar). I was ecstatic. Chris gave them our information and they paused awkwardly. "I'm sorry Mr. Bueford, we don't see a reservation for you." This would have been a completely legitimate situation to continue our terrible day. It would have made sense if that was what had happened. But I’m just kidding. That didn’t happen. They got us our keys and we were in the elevator headed to floor 2- OUR. ROOM.
The room was splendid. Big, fluffy white bed. Down comforter so poofy you sank several inches deep. Down pillows. Dark walls. Modern fixtures. BATHROOM. WATER. RELIEF. We cleaned up. Freshened up. Bathroomed. Watered. Showered. Did whatever we could to cleanse ourselves from the day and muster up enough energy to hunt down food. Room service wasn’t really an option due to overpriced, unappealing choices. We opted to walk a few blocks outside our hotel to find something more interesting.We had to walk back the way we had just came. I wasn’t even frustrated about that. I was absolutely willing to do it. I wanted food. By this time though, if I was being real honest, I was so used to going without food I wasn’t all that hungry. It was more the principle of the thing. I was going to get nutrition if it killed me. Ironically serious. We turned onto a side street that hosted a slew of unique and intriguing restaurants and bakeries. It looked fabulous. Unfortunately, as late as it was, most were closed. (It was close to midnight by now.) Their windows were the story tellers of what was inside. The draperies, decorations hiding in the dark, types of tables and chairs featured- all of them told a beautiful tale of the atmosphere during business hours. Menus posted on every door uncovered secrets the dark windows left hanging in the air. We made a mental wish list of places we wanted to visit when they were open. There was a Dominoes Pizza on the corner. Chris and I instantly headed that direction without even feeling guilty about it. No hesitation from either. It was if we both understood how perfectly that cheap pizza place would satisfy our needs. Under normal circumstances, I would have been completely against such an atrocious choice while in a culinary legend of a place as Paris. But, I will admit, I wasn’t up for any more “adventure”. I was desperately craving comfort. Home type comfort. Dominoes offered such a perfect combination of ease and familiarity that we couldn’t turn down. So. Our first night in Paris was spent scarfing pizza in a room we had an inflated appreciation for while watching The League (TV Show on Netflix) on my phone. It was the most indulgent evening yet. After the most awful day yet.

Monday, December 16, 2013

Chapter 2- We're in it, Europe deep

The next morning we woke very early. Way before the sun. At home, this never happens. Unless we have to get up to use the bathroom or the dog needs to do the same. And then it's straight back to bed after that. We aren't morning people, really. Jet lag had us not on Germany time and not really on home’s time either. No man’s time. We readied for the day with showers and packing back up our bags we so hastily tore apart the night before. We were downstairs for breakfast by 8 (my mother could attest to the shock of something like this). Our lovely hosts had the table set with fancy white china and wine glasses. One large white karaf had Orange juice. A silver platter served meats and cheeses. Another silver platter had two white china tea pots with hot coffee. The man, named Mr Grolig, stood and chatted with us best he could in English while we ate. He told us he taught himself English from watching tv and the internet. He said he has visitors from all over the world coming to see the castle. He recounted some of his fondest memories of past guests with a big smile. He spoke of a very large family that came and stayed from Mexico. They sang songs and played guitar during their breakfast. He found that quite entertaining. He chuckled as he told that story as if he was reliving the excitement in his head. You could tell he loved his “work”. He has had folks from Japan and Peru and Canada and America. I'm sure he said many other countires but I don't remember them now. His wife was short and round and very delightful, but knew very little English. She kept herself busy, out of sight in the kitchen. When she would appear she was cheerful, but quiet. I would have loved to talk more with both of them. They had so much to say, so much I wanted to listen to. We finished breakfast and prepared for the long walk. The castle was about a three mile hike one way. Short compared to yesterday's wanderings, but long enough to where we had to keep on schedule. We had to make our train to head to Amsterdam at 11:45. We began our walk out of town, the way we had headed the day before, toward the hotel too booked to put us up. Past the hotel, there was a trail of mud we had to traverse. I had hoped maybe the mud would end, but it never did. My short legs allowed my pants to drag in the mud. I knew I would be a mess when all this was over. We walked along the river for quite some time. It was fast and overflowing. It looked near flood stage. Trees were half engulfed by the water hiding their entire trunks so just the branches peeked out. The trail was narrow with mountain to one side and cliff to the other. A bit unnerving to the clumsy. I'm no graceful swan, especially when you add slippery elements like rain and mud. But, that didn't scare me nor slow me. I let Chris do the worrying about my stability.
In 3 miles worth of hiking, we had talks about who may have traveled the woods before us. German culture. Food. Love. Other things to keep the time passing. After 3 years of marriage, we still have lots to talk about. We rounded a large mountain side that finally revealed what all the walking was for- Burg Eltz. It was beautiful. I was mad my phone was dead. The only pictures I have are what Google provides and what I saw. The old brick and towers stood out from the mountain watching over the large valley. We climbed a great deal of stairs built into the cliff side to reach the top of a rock wall built to lead directly to the castle. The castle gate was closed, tourist season for this place was over. We were able to walk around one side of the castle to see all of the different spires, doors, and windows. The castle housed many families. When a son or daughter would marry, the entire family would come to live in the castle and an addition would be built on for their living space. We stared for a long time, talking about what it must have been like "back then", but also trying to break long enough to recharge before retracing our steps back down the mountain. Sometimes, we were quiet. Just looking to look. At the meadow, at the castle overlooking all the greenery. There were patches of fog floating around, bringing in a beautiful and quiet essence to the entire scene.
Thankfully, we made it back down without any mishaps, other than my jeans being so dirty and muddy. Not in exaggeration, mud was up to my knees! It was enough to get some laughs from some old men back at the hotel as we passed. They asked Chris in German why he didn't carry me. I don't understand German very well, but their laughter and hand gestures translated the message well. Once in town, some old farmers drove by in Mercedes tractors (it seems every moving vehicle in Germany is Mercedes- the buses, the garbage trucks, farm equipment, dump trucks) and they even had some laughs over my muddy pants. Picture it however you will, but it was quite a funny sight. We returned to our bed and breakfast to grab our packs. I, of course, stood outside because of the terrible mess I was. We donned the extra weight and set back toward the empty structure of a train stop. Another 3 mile walk. Once at the train station, I had to change my pants. I wasn't about to travel to Amsterdam looking more like a gypsy than I already did (our packs and bundled up attire always seemed to get stares as if we may be some sort of stinky drifter). We caught our train for Amsterdam and thus began the next part of our journey. We arrived in Amsterdam after 7pm. The central train station was packed full of people who knew where they were headed. We did not. Quite the confusion. Chris is not a fan of stopping amidst a crowd so the rule is, "walk until you find a place to plan where to go next". We followed a herd out into the main square where even more people were. Catching buses and trams and riding bikes. Hectic! Somehow we found a place Chris deemed worthy to check the instructions on how to get to our apartment. We hopped a bus and hoped we were headed in the right direction. Traveling by bus with our packs on our backs was always a pain. Our packs were too heavy to easily take off and on in hurried situations and they were too large to really fit both pack and butt on the seat. You end up with about an inch of seat holding your bum. Thankfully, the bus ride was just a few minutes. We had about 8 blocks to walk, and we covered the ground quickly. I wanted to look at everything as we walked, but it was not easy to keep up, watch where I was going and soak in the sites all at once. The central train station had been a real sight, glorious in it's castle-esque structure and detail, but I had no such luck of doing much gazing there either. Enroute is not the time, my heavy pack easily reminded me of that. The owner of the apartment we rented was Amanda. She greeted us at the door with well wishes and apologies for the rain and cold. She was very chatty and welcoming. She walked us up the steepest stairs I had ever been on. As I climbed I could touch the stairs in front of me, much like a ladder. Quite tricky for someone with any sort of balance issues. Add a very heavy, bulky pack weighing you down in the opposite direction you are going and it much becomes like a challenge rather than a regular task.
Once past the cliff of stairs, we entered the apartment.
It was modern. White everywhere.
A balcony overlooked a courtyard.
A walk in shower, normal bathroom. Nothing overtly outstanding, but it would be ours for the next few days and that was exciting. Amanda stayed and chatted about everything the city had to offer. She talked so quickly and so animatedly even I had a hard time keeping up. I'm not sure if traveling had taken me down a few notches in my socialization game or if she really was that much more exuberant than I. After she left, I only remember falling asleep. I don't remember how I was able to unpack and ready myself for bed, but I remember falling asleep. It was still only 7ish in the evening, so really it shouldn't have been bedtime. By it was for me. And I slept for a very long time. Chris said be contemplated multiple times if he should wake me, but he let me rest. I'm always thankful for his thoughtful gestures. Unfortunately, my gift of rest meant I was wide awake at 5am the next morning. Still in limbo on the time zone situation. Getting up and at em early in the morning had its advantages, though. I'm sure over the years my mom tried to instill that in me, but it never sank in. Being up early has never been a priority of mine, still isn't. But on this trip, being up early has been a bit rewarding. In Amsterdam, we were ready just as dawn was lifting night’s blanket off the city. Light just barely beginning to glow the sky. The air still crisp from the night, the street lanterns all still lit. Everywhere quiet. It felt like I owned the city. Like I could do anything I wanted with no refusal. I could go anywhere I wanted. No one standing in my way, bumping into me, blocking my view or having some pointless loud conversation on their cell phone as they zipped by. Just me and Chris. The streets were ours.
They would be until almost 9am as stated by most shops in the area. This city has seemed to have also adopted my late-morning-start belief system. In this case it was both a blessing and a curse. We enjoyed exploring on foot the empty streets the water canals the millions of bikes locked up in piles along the streets. What we hoped to find was breakfast. Coffee shops weren't even open yet. Chris explained most coffee shops in Amsterdam were not really focused on coffee so much as selling joints (with quite the variety at that!). Coffee was just an added feature to the more sought after commodity. We walked dedicatedly toward the breakfast place Chris had saved in his GPS years ago when he lived in Amsterdam. He had always wanted to eat there (never did because who wants to eat at a fancy breakfast shop alone?), and now he was taking me to share the experience. It was called The Pancake House. In Dutch culture, pancakes aren't necessarily a breakfast food, so when we came upon the place, it was also closed. We had a little over an hour to kill. When you are hungry, aimlessly walking about is slightly less enjoyable. My stomach seemed to drown out my thoughts as I tried to take in the overwhelming cityscape. We walked past the Anne Frank house. Pausing for a moment to examine the outside. I wish I remembered more of the history I learned in high school so I could truly feel the depth of what I was seeing. I tried to remind myself multiple times of the centuries of history made in all the places I visited. I put into perspective how young our country is while reading plaques dating the buildings and statues we passed. 1100, 1300, 15th century. Earlier even. Long before America was discovered by any European. The age of the places we visited, not any in particular, showed. There seemed to be a wisdom of sorts floating in the air. People were hugely different here. Europe, here. People eat slow, drink a lot. Enjoy life. America seems so hyped up, so fast paced compared to European places. Each city, each country had its differences, yes. But in large, Europe had a significantly different way of looking about day to day life. I liked it. There was no sense of entitlement because it is not allowed. Or tolerated would be a better word. Or, maybe due to the ancient wisdom passed down, it’s just not even a thought in someone’s mind that they would be “entitled” to anything. Long, long heritages maybe taught more about blessings than takings. People weren't necessarily more polite, just significantly less intrusive with their need to be heard and accommodated. You might be thinking- she experienced the romances of a “vacation”, not to mention visited places where the language wasn’t always English therefore didn’t really know or see REAL life. But--- we don’t do resort touristy vacations. We try to do life the way the locals do life. We aren’t attracted to the fake recreations of travelers. We rather to experience a city in all its realness and discover its hidden treasures only the locals can recommend. Traveling to us is NOT jumping on the tour train (in fact, avoiding it at all costs)- full of replicas and forced expressions of the city’s culture. I’d rather pick up the subtle hints of their beliefs and priorities that bleed out via the places no magazine reports. The places that reveal history without a plaque. The places that tell you stories without a cover charge. We choose to experience real life wherever we go, not escape it. This trip wasn’t about an escape. It was about an experience. Amsterdam in itself, because of its unique identity, is a largely traveled city. We weren’t unique in our desire to go there. But we rented a flat in a residential area to experience life in Amsterdam, not just view it from the international points of interest. We shopped at the local grocer market. We rode our bikes. We ate at places we stumbled upon in our neighborhood. Granted 2 nights is different than a year or 30 living there, but from the vibe, I’d take up residence there in a heartbeat. Honestly, after tasting different flavors of life around Europe I began wishing the unrealistic wish to live at least a few more lives. All different. Each focused on different directions to produce a hugely different outcome. I’d love the chance to live a life where I focused on education and writing to lead me living in Amsterdam- writing, working, living something so foreign to what I have already lived. I entertained the daydream as if I could pick and choose how that other life would go- and many others, playing out the differences and the highlights- more like a movie than reality. But still, from what I’ve seen, living in another country with a completely different lifestyle looks pretty enticing- even if it would inevitably still include mundane duties and routines (which it would). There’s an atmosphere, an energy from the particular history and culture that cannot be replicated in the States. You can’t read about it, you can’t pick it apart in some social science major- it’s just there and it’s either in sync with what you believe or it’s not. You will only know when you visit the foreign places yourself. You will only reckon with it once you’re in it- and then, you will understand what all other travelers try to explain but can’t. It’s not magical because it’s a vacation, it’s magical because there’s something so deep, so rich resonating from the ground, the buildings and the people that you can’t make it through the city without being touched by it. Regardless of my romantic descriptions, it’s very real. I jive with it. I dig it. I hoped I would come back different. Changed by the observations I had made. Wandering streets that have housed centuries of lives, living and dying, changes and revolutions, cultures instilled deeper than any I have experienced. I hoped many times that stays with me. I hoped I could bring it back and keep it. It's not seen in any picture I have taken, but I hoped I would be able to see it when I looked in the mirror. When I pour into my marriage and my daughter, I hoped it would be reflected. Now that I’m back, it’s a lot harder than it sounds to keep it. I already feel it slipping away. I feel so far from what I had in Europe. Almost as if it was in another life that I was there. I guess that is part of why I wrote- to hold on to “it” the best I could. We stumbled upon a beautiful palace encircling a large plaza.To the side of the palace, was an ornate structure, most likely a church. Tucked in a tiny corner was a chain coffee shop, selling actual coffee. We huddled into its tiny 3 walls [it truly was built into a corner] and ordered our hot drinks. We sat in chairs set up in the plaza, drinking our coffee smoking a morning cigarette. (Sorry, Mom, I lied, they were for us. But it’s a Europe thing, so it’s ok.) The sun was starting rise and people were coming and going, increasing every 15 minutes or so. I can't say I remember much of our conversations while we sat or wandered that morning. But they were rich in the moment. We enjoyed our down time just as much as the fervent exploring or the determined searching. I'm sure we talked about the old cobblestone worn down by how many billions, trillions or some astronomical number, of feet had shuffled along over hundreds of years. We examined the architecture of the church and the palace. Statues and spires and carvings and doors, all fascinating as a whole and individually. Overwhelming as a whole, actually. Individually, each stone carving, each doorway with it’s storytale of figurines and images were so impactful. It took so much focus just to gaze over one section of a structure. To figure out why the faces and the people and the statues were there. What they were trying to depict? What they were documenting with such ornate art? We finished our overpriced coffees and figured by the time we meandered back to the pancake house it would just be opening. People were out and about now, riding their bikes with such confidence along cars and crowds of pedestrians. I had a bit of panic rise up in me as I knew we would be renting our bikes next. I have been afraid to even attempt riding a bike in Salem because of traffic, and this entire combination of goofy angled streets with cars and buses and trams and other bikers looked entirely way too complicated. But, Que sera sera. I figured, it will work out and if not, I will have one helluva story to tell about my failed bike attempt in Amsterdam. As we assumed, the pancake house was just opening up.
A delivery truck was parked right outside. Delivering beer and wine it appeared. The truck was as wide as the whole street. The better way to phrase that would actually be to say, the street was only as wide as the small delivery truck. 7 maybe 8 cars patiently waited behind it as it did its business with the shop workers. No honking horns, or rolling eyes. The cars' drivers appeared calm and nonchalant about the hold up. Reading newspapers, playing on their phones, doing make up. Maybe they welcomed the stop. There's definitely no way you could drive in Amsterdam while multitasking. You would be sure to kill a pedestrian or overly confident biker. This stop may have given them the time they needed to ready or decompress before arriving to work. Bikes were not held up, they zipped in and out of the cars and around the truck without pause. We allowed the truck to finish unloading before going in. We ducked down into the small doorway. One step in and already greeted with 5 or 6 steep steps down into the sunken dining area. It was quaintly decorated with old pictures hung on exposed original brick. Dim lighting from a few hanging chandeliers and red tea lights on the tables set a fantastic morning mood.
The wait staff greeted us and handed out menus. At first glance, I could tell this would be no IHOP pancake house (not that I would want an IHOP experience in Amsterdam anyway). The menu listed funky combinations of pancakes. Things like bacon, ham, cheese and mushrooms stuffed into your pancake. They also had “themed” pancakes that I was quite curious about. What is a COP pancake? Or a PRINCESS one? Or a UNICORN crepe? A FIREMAN one too? I wished Zoe was available to order one for me.
Just to see. Heck, I just wished Zoe was seeing and experiencing what we were seeing and experiencing. I think it all would have been good for her. Good for her growing and developing brain to be introduced to such differentness. The arrangement of adding veggies and meats and cheeses sounded more like an omelet than a pancake. There was a "key" to understanding the menu at the bottom right. Colored dots signified finding sweet pancakes or savory or vegetarian or popular choices. You could locate a pancake and to the left see the dots coding their genre. Although, you could tell just by reading the ingredients what to expect, the coded dots added some sort of comfort in being guided through this new taste bud adventure. We chose 1 savory pancake and 1 sweet. For our savory- ham, cheese and onions (I would have preferred mushrooms). For the sweet-a traditional Dutch pancake with powdered sugar. On our table a large tub of dark brown grainy syrup sat with a wooden spoon in it. The waiter told us it was made from beet sugar and was very popular. We also had a Caramel syrup and regular maple in bottles next to the tub. The ingredients in the bottled syrups were simple. No high fructose corn syrup and no long list of crazy preservatives. Just sugar, maple and maybe a flavoring. No added coloring to make it look a certain ideal way. I found consistently, even though I already knew it to be true, that all European food keeps to the beneficial system of fewer ingredients, less salt, no preservatives and no artificial coloring. No added funky chemicals. Funny thing, it's also incredibly cheaper too. INCREDIBLY. A package of cookies were 85 cents, a half gallon of bottled water was 30 cents, bread was less than a Euro. Meats and cheeses were about 3 Euros. We ate grocery store items like these quite often to save money. We planned one large meal to eat out, the rest were snack items. The pancakes came out rather quickly. They were larger than our plates. Nearly the size of a large pizza. We chose to try the savory pancake first. I was quite skeptical about liking this odd combination. I'm not one for mixing genres when it comes to my food. I don't like sweet sauces on my meat that should taste salty. I don't like fruit on my pizza or in my salad. Even if they do taste good combined, I don't like to do it. I guess it's a mental quirk I have. But I promised to be open minded regarding food on this trip, so this was the first real test of such promise. I didn't hesitate or skimp on the size of bite for my first. I figured I better just dive right in. To my surprise, it was delicious. The pancake didn't really taste like a pancake. It was more of a flat, crispy crepe used to hold all the ingredients together ever so neatly. I enjoyed the pancake so thoroughly I told Chris I would like to learn how to make them. He chuckled as he does when I make a declaration that very well will never come to pass. My ideal mind likes to wish upon endeavors, but my realistic life usually gets in the way of ever actually doing them. The sweet pancake of course was delightful. I didnt like the beet sugar syrup and elected to eat my half with just the powdered sugar. The Orange juice we ordered was real fresh squeezed oranges. We watched them make it. It wasn't sweet like the sugar loaded stuff you buy from the store. It was a bit tart and had a ton of pulp in it. I sipped it slowly because of those two qualities. But it was very refreshing, just like an Orange. Back out on the street, tummies full and minds fueled, we headed toward the bike rental shop. I loved looking at all the people. Amsterdam was funky. The people, their style. They made tattoos, piercings and mismatched clothing look so......fitting. There was a hodgepodge of “anything goes” strutting about. I absolutely wanted to join that trend. I think a part of me has never really followed fashion trends because I like to keep things a bit different, but at the same time these people made me feel like I was a sell out. Like I wasn't true to what I really wanted to be. I have made fitting in a priority back home and I definitely think I lost bits and pieces of my identity in it over the years. These unique and careless whimsicals made me want to be free from that. This would be another lesson I'd like to hang on to, being true to my own preferences and rocking what I got instead of always trying to conform to what's expressed by others around me. The bike shop was just around the corner from our apartment, which would be nice when it came time to return them and hustle to find our next travel port. Although, I absolutely didn't want to think of leaving! This place was fascinating and I had only seen a good few hours worth! I was hoping we wouldn't get the "tourist bikes". I had seen many around. They were bright green or bright yellow signifying they were rented and you were dumb to the ways of Amsterdam. I didn't pretend to be suave about this place, but I sure didn't want others to see it so clearly as a neon target. Thankfully the guy gave us two normal, beat up bikes. Mine was white with rust and dings. Chris' was black adorned with the same wear and tear. We had to leave my passport for the entire time we had the bikes. I worried this would conflict with going to a bar, but I tell you now, I was never asked for ID in Europe. They don't do that to anyone. And yet, I never saw sloppy drunks like I have in Vegas or Denver or even Portland. You would think with the liberal outlook Amsterdam has that I would have seen some atrocious behaviours, but by far, Vegas is way dirtier and outwardly more scandalous than Amsterdam. And yes, we went to the Red Light District. Multiple times. But I will get to that later. For now, I was going to have to learn how to ride this creaky bike alongside fast moving cars, oncoming bikers and ignorant pedestrians. In Europe, no one has the "right of way", if you don't go, someone else will. If someone else is going, they don't intend to stop for you, so you wait or you risk injury. Thankfully the streets we had to first ride on were quiet and easy to navigate. They introduced us to the task gently and gave us time to reduce our wobbles and get a grip on the flow of traffic. I felt instantly confident about my ability to maneuver. Maybe it was ignorance maybe excitement, but either way we were headed toward the busy streets of downtown without reservation. The wind felt great blowing on my face as we coasted along side streets leading into the busier areas. It was crisp and cool, making my cheeks rosy pink, I'm sure. We entered our first busy street, zooming alongside cars going the same speed as us. To my right there were parked cars, to my left moving cars. In front and behind there were more riders. I was more worried about the parked cars than the moving ones, to be honest. I was waiting for a door to open just as I sped by only to be brutally halted by its anchored position. We had a prearranged system- I was to ring my bell if I encountered any issue to let Chris know he should look back. Even when I wasn't ringing my bell, I caught him periodically looking back to make sure he hadn't lost his wife somewhere in the hustled mess. I worried at some point his looking back would cause him to wreck, but as time proved, he was much better coordinated than I. I had to follow his lead without question, the speed we were going didn't allow time for argument or course changes. We entered busier and busier areas, with junctions that were more and more confusing. It seemed rare in the busy square to encounter a 4 way intersection. There were odd off ramps and merge lanes creating 7 way crossings. 6 ways. Turning lanes that turned against my hometown tuition and headed into complete opposite directions. Oy. We approached a suedo intersection. With off ramps and on ramps but no actual turns. Chris took a" left" which was more like a straight, while I was somehow headed on the off ramp. My first instinct was just to swerve from the off ramp to join his decision, but my body was wise enough to pause. The pause meant a car, then two sped past me in the directions they knew they wanted to go. Chris seemed so far away. I stopped and dramatically rang my bell over and over. For some reason, I didn't feel I could correct my mistake and catch up with him. Instead, I hoped he would retrace his path and come save me. I'm not usually a helpless broad, and it’s humorous to me now that all I thought to do was ring my stupid little bell. All panicky like a little girl. But, my sweet man heard, saw my wide eyes from all the way down the street and came to my rescue. Laughing the whole way. He still recounts that as a favorite moment of his on the trip. So ridiculous. We made it, with no other incident, to the most “touristic” part of town. Along a canal. Beautiful architectures all around. Little shops with crazy weird gifts, "coffee shops" and musician beggars of all kinds. Talented and interesting. There was a certain attraction we were headed there to see. The Sex Museum. That is supposed to elicit a chuckle. Its not as scandalous (yes, it is) as it sounds. I read reviews that it was for those with a light heart and a good sense of humor. I consider Chris and I to fall in those categories, so we went. It was quite a riot. Interesting too. If you think our 21st century heathens have invented new sexual perversions far from the original intended form, I would like to share, no we haven't. I saw art from 500 bc that would suggest we haven't come up with anything new. There were comical practical jokes throughout the building. There were serious displays of art from all different eras and countries. I took tons of pictures (because it was allowed by both staff and my husband- usually those 2 items prevent me from taking too many photos) and because it was just too interesting not to. Obviously, those photos can't be shared here, but I'm happy to share if you're brave enough! (Nothing too crazy, I promise...Sorta) We moved along with the hoards of people shuffling in and out of shops browsing at all the things vendors would put a price on. This was the most people we had seen packed in one area yet on our trip. Germany seemed empty compared to this. It wasn’t anything frustrating, just an observation.
Then again, we tend to stay away from tourist pits as best we can, so being in this area full of travelers thirsty for the city tour, meant we would be subject to their masses of confusion, photographs, and maps. We broke away from the herd of people moving along the main walk to explore the surrounding area. There was a beautiful church to circle, an intriguing pub I had to drink at and according to our GPS, the Red Light District was hiding somewhere near. We hunted for a place to chain our bikes up. I’ve never been in a place where bicycling was so popular that parking was more in demand for bikes than cars. Sorry Portland, but you don’t even hold a candle to Amsterdam in this area (or any other for that matter, regardless how weird you try to be!). Every possible pole, ledge, cage, immovable object a bike could be anchored to, you would find at least 3 or 4 piled on top of each other. Along the bridge every inch was crowded with bikes mangled and shoved into a space that would allow them to be attached via chain and locked to the bridge railing. I’m curious how strangers detangle their massive metal workings from all the others when it is time to unlock and depart. We had to walk our bikes a good 4 blocks before we found an acceptable place to lock up. Our bikes looked like everyone else’s (desirable under every instance but one- I worried we may have trouble re-locating them after exploring.) It would have been different had the bikes been ours. If the dings, scratches and life lived on them were in our memories. It would’ve created an intimacy making it impossible to lose our own bike. You could tell people loved their bikes. One- none of them looked even close to new. Two- they got creative with adding things like decorative seats (also never looking new) and baskets, handlebars and bells. All had color and expressions of their owners' love for them. No two bikes were similar. If I was a cheesy tourist interested in wasting time, I would have taken tons of pictures of some of the interesting bikes I saw. But I wasn't trying to look like one of those tourists, and I definitely didn't have the time. My man moves quickly, and there's a keep up or get lost rule built into our travelings. We walked, wandered actually, around on the cobble stone roads and walks. We neared the church I wanted to see. It was smack dab in the middle of the Red Light District. I was curious which came first- the sinful streets or the place of worship. Was the church an attempt to save lost souls in the middle of a dark place or were the streets of Red created out of rebellion beyond the church walls? Either seemed a symbol of freedom from the other. As we walked past the front of the church which faced the main road, we rounded to the side of the brick structure. To our left, the beautiful towers and stained glass of the catholic church- directly to our right were little glass rooms with velvet drapes and red lights. Some were empty with but a tall bar stool. Some were not. The first inhabited glass box of a room housed a chubby black woman dressed in ill-fitted lingerie. She was playing on her cell phone. The room next to her was another chubby woman. White and looking to be in her 50's. Maybe a job like that doesn't allow you to age so gracefully? 50 seems a bit old to still be turning tricks, I would assume. Then again, I know very little about the business and the demands of such a product. (At least in this form, anyway.) I was surprised at both- neither were the Victoria's Secret models with smooth dance moves I assumed did this kind of vocation.
It was only 3 or 4 in the afternoon, so most of the rooms following were empty. These glass humanquariums were stacked one right next to another down the street, wrapping all around the church. I find it interesting for those to be in the church looking out or in the glass rooms looking straight on to the place where people say God lives. Does the scenery for either looking out affect their perception of what they live for? Does the contrast invoke any insight or thought? To me, the two usually seem so far apart from each other (geographically) that it creates an out of sight out of mind way of going about business. Maybe this layout is how it should be. No ability to deny the other's existence. Recognition does some powerful things. Ignorance does too.
The church was not the only "out of place" establishment in the area. Every 4 or 5 glass window would abruptly end to a buzzing pub or fancy restaurant. Bakeries were common to see as well. So- buy your bagel and coffee prior to mass, then join your mother for a fancy lunch. Follow it up by an encounter with a glass room and a beer at the pub. Sounds so....clashing. I tell you, some of the restaurants were so fancy you wondered how they got stuck (or opted for) such a location. Some of the bakeries looked so cute and innocent with their sweet treats so specialized, you had to question if they were naive to their whereabouts.
These streets went on and on for blocks and blocks and alley upon alley. It was quite the intriguing area. Something new and shocking around every corner. Walking along the cobblestone was really starting to affect my bad ankle. There are times I feel my body is revolting against my mental youth by invoking elderly physical pain. Throughout the trip, I've had mini battles with my back and ankle, but I've ignored them- pushing on. Unfortunately, cobblestone is a crazy terrain and it sure was doing its damage. I hate admitting defeat, especially to my body, but I had to be smart or I would reach a crippling state. We had easily walked 5 or 6 miles for the day, including the morning's roamings, so it wouldn't be total concession to take a break, right? Chris threatened multiple times on the trip that when we get back I am having the surgery my doctor advised me to have 2 years ago. I can only imagine the damage I have done in the last couple years, not to mention this trip. Stupid old body. I'm scared of such an extensive reconstructive surgery with screws and rods and nearly a year of rehab. I partially rebel against the procedure for the simple fact that I feel like I'm not old enough to be falling apart, I'm not ready to admit I already need joints fixed. But the pain does get pretty bad. I do look quite silly hobbling along trying not to let it stop me. Pushing forward with a changed walk just to prove I can still "walk". We began making our way back to where we thought our bikes were. It's never good to push yourself to your breaking point THEN have to push even farther searching for relief (it would have been different had we known exactly where relief was, instead, we were only guessing). It's the searching without certainty that magnifies the problem. Every wrong turn, every doubted direction. I led us so far in the wrong direction, when we finally discovered a landmark revealing where we were, we had about a mile to retrace. Realizing you went the wrong way is frustrating enough- add excruciating pain on top of it and it's infuriating. By now my ego was totally humbled and I looked like a well-dressed beggar just hobbling alongside a sympathetic kind man. Ridiculous scene. Chris' directing found us the bikes and I was ever so grateful. I was done with cobblestone for a bit. We took our bikes and whirred around the city streets in the cool autumn air. We visited a few grocery markets. Exploring their particular selection of cheeses, meats, breads, cookies and whatever else we wouldn't normally find in the States. I'm not a huge fan of their meat. Fatty, sometimes raw, just overall questionable looking. We stuck to what we knew we would like. Cookies, crackers and cheese. There wasn't a chocolate in the place I didn't want to try. All of their candy looked exciting. The wrapping- retro. The combinations- unique. Drinks were another fun item in Europe. Everything was so cheap. Everything looked so thirst quenching. The extensive selection of beer- all new to our taste-buds. The mysterious wines all local all exciting, even if they did taste similar to the ones we loved back home. Juices all natural, organic and untouched by gallons of sugar. We purchased our findings, strapped them to the back of my bike, and headed back to the apartment for a bit of rest. We knew the evening would be a late one! Last night in Amsterdam and we definitely hadn't soaked in enough.

Thursday, December 5, 2013

Chapter 1 of the Great Europe Escape

Leading up to our trip, we planned very little. It's not really either my nor my, husband's personality, to plan ahead. So far, we have made it through life very fortunate that personality trait (or flaw, depending on who you ask) has not failed us miserably. Either we are very very resourceful amongst trouble or God is good to us. I believe a combination of the two. Because we didn't spend a lot of time planning, the day before our trip seemed to sneak right up on us. It didn't even feel real that the next morning we would be embarking on a life changing journey. We spent the day lazily packing while cleaning up a bit and mid way through, my husband decided he should look for lodging at any one of our destinations. Originally, he had later stated, he had allotted maybe an hour to the whole endeavor. It took us 3. And that was only booking lodging in 3 of the 6 cities we would be visiting. We bought a train fare to Moslekern, Germany and another to Amsterdam. We also got our bus ticket to Paris. But we got bored with the online spending and the hours of research, so we stopped. We were supposed to be in bed early enough so that waking at 3am and traveling all day (about 19hrs total) would not be a detriment to our attitudes and health. We stayed up till 130am. For no real reason. I suppose you could blame a bit of childish excitement, but really we ate Chipotle way too late and decided hanging out with Edward (Chris' brother) was a good way to spend a Saturday night. We awoke after a few short hours of sleep and piled into the car. If we were forgetting anything sleep deprivation wouldn’t have allowed us to realize it. We drove to Eugene airport and thus it began. Our trip.
To be honest, the day of traveling is a bit of a blur. Lack of sleep, lack of ample water, lack of good bathrooms and probably the feeling as though we were traveling into the future (if you want to consider an 8 hour time change time travel) all could attribute to little anamnesis of that day. From what I remember, we flew into Salt Lake City for a brief jaunt from one terminal to the next. It was snowing. Big giant flakes of white. We landed in Atlanta where it was 65 and sunny. We had a bit of time there. The international flight was about 7hours long. We watched part of OZ and ate dinner. The dinner they brought us was actually quiet delectable. I was expecting near prison food (I can’t use the most common example of cafeteria food because I came from a small town where the cooks made things from scratch and we loved our lunches). Instead of what I assume prison food is, came a tray with hot baked chicken breast, mashed potatoes and broccoli. We had Tillamook cheese for our crackers, which was pretty shocking considering Tillamook is this little local town in Oregon and we were on an international flight to Ireland. We even had a dessert brownie.
In real life, thats not a meal you take a picture of, unless you're lost in a Facebook junkie addiction, but I was impressed with the pleasant meal provided by what I always considered a stingy travel company. Had we wanted, we could have indulged on at least 5 very large glasses of red wine. They handed wine out every hour it seemed. But due to the aforementioned sleep, water and bathrooms situations, we had one glass of red wine each and then tried to hydrate the best we could with good old h2o. We landed in Dublin at 6 something am their time. It was very cold and dark. We took a bus from the airport to our hotel in desperate hopes they would let us check in absurdly early. It was a long walk from the bus station to our hotel. Our packs were quite heavy and again, it was cold and dark. If Chris hadn't scared me about pickpockets and being robbed, I wouldn't have felt this incredible urge to walk so quickly. At one point I thought a guy was following us and I made Chris turn into an open deli market. He teased me and regretted trying to strike fear in me with earlier tales of seedy thugs on Europe's streets. We did make it to our hotel unrobbed, but frozen from the cold rain and cramped from the weight of our packs. It was quite the shock our bodies were under, hours and hours of cramped sitting while on the plane, then without warning, adding giant packs and forcing our legs to quickly carry us a mile or 2 to our hotel in the freezing cold. We hoped our disheveled look would bring pity from our hotel front desk sir. It did. We were able to check in early at no extra cost (although I'm certain we would have paid whatever needed due to our desperation). We took our hot showers and drank our water and went to bed. We didn't even spend much time exploring our room’s view or our amenities. (Later to discover, the view was cool and the room was bare.) We awoke in the middle of the afternoon. Slightly refreshed. We headed out to view what we could within walking distance. The very first sight was Christ Church. Built before any European had set foot on America (c.1030). We walked around some other historical sites. The wall of Dublin. A few other cathedrals. Old buildings with no name in my head, just beauty. The architecture was all so fascinating. Gorgeous rock and spires and towers and pillars.
The streets were hectic. Cars coming to 7 way intersections. Driving opposite directions of what we’re used to. The curves and bends of the roads made it nearly impossible to gauge where cars would be coming from and if or when it were safe to cross the road. Our outting didn't last more than a few hours. Night was coming down onto the city and we were again feeling sleepy. We ducked into an Irish pub called Darkey Kelleys connected to our hotel. It was awesome. Darkly lit, old worn wooden floors. Wood tables and wood benches, all old as well. Some tables were big beer barrels. There was one guy running the show at the bar. Taking drink and food orders while bussing tables and who knows what else keeping busy. He was young. Not friendly, just straight forward. We would ask a question and get a short, accurate answer. I grabbed a local red beer on tap, Chris ordered Guinness. Dinner for me was a traditional Irish Shepherd's pie and Chris got some grilled chicken dish. We enjoyed the atmosphere and ate trying to stay up late enough to see the evening bar crowd maybe filter in. But 8pm on a Monday (every day on vacation seems like a Saturday, so we easily forgot it was a weeknight) is not a hoppin pub night. We didn't mind. We were too tired anyway.
Back to sleep and up early to repack our jammed crammed full packs and fly to Dusseldorf, Germany. We again awoke at some ungodly early hour way before the sun would be up to warm the air. We packed quickly and again walked the dark rainy streets back to a bus to travel to the airport. We stood forever waiting for the bus, hiding under a shop overhang to cover from the rain. I silently worried we were at the wrong place many times, but didn't say anything. The bus arrived after 45 minutes of second guessing where we were supposed to be, we boarded and began another day of traveling.
The flight into Dusseldorf was very quick. We landed and realized very quickly it was even colder in Germany. We had to wait outside for a tram to take us to the train station. My cheeks rosied in a matter of minutes. Our train ride from Dusseldorf to Moselkern was difficult. Chris had gotten sick from the wear and tear on our bodies (more likely the gross flu/cold thing I got a few days before we left the States). He was grumpy and tired and unable to breathe through his nose. Battling aches and chills and moments of fever. I was too awake to sleep and fascinated by everything out the window. We chugged along the Rhine River for a few hours at speeds of 120mph +. I saw castles and houses and churches so magnificently built and scattered across the hills. Their towers all kinds of shapes and their stained glass windows. The little towns clustered along the river neatly. Usually, you could spot the church steeple peeking above the tall thin houses in the center of the village. Most likely- there was a castle looming on a hilltop nearby as well.
I spent a lot of time thinking because Chris was sleeping. I had epiphanies I've already forgotten. I daydreamed about the ancient lives lived in the different areas. I stared out the window at the very intriguing and sometimes quite talented graffiti lining the dividers from the train tracks and the hills. Hands down, the best graffiti art I've ever seen in real life on a consistent basis. We had one stop along the way in Duisberg. We didn't walk about too far from the train station, but within the train station there were all kinds of shops and eateries. Even McDonald's. I got a hot cup of “white chocolate”. It tasted like melted marshmallows and was completely delightful in every way. Thick. Hot. Sweet. But not too sweet. The train station kept us occupied until our next departure. We found a cool tobacco shop and bought some cigarettes and snuff (don't worry Mom, “it wasn't for us”. Haha) We also went into a market to buy some batteries. Everything was so much cheaper in Germany than the US. I wanted to buy tons of stuff and just send it home. But, Chris and the lack of room in my pack wouldn't allow for frivolous purchases. We arrived in Moslekern, Germany around 330pm. The train station was so small it didn't even have a bathroom or drinking fountain. It was not heated and was at best just a four walled shelter for folks to identify the train’s stopping point. Chris reminded me he wasn't feeling so well so finding a place to stay was the biggest priority. We had about a mile and a half walk from the station down the tiny streets of the town to the first guesthaus.
We walked along the quiet cobblestone streets. We were the only life within eyesight and earshot. The tall, old buildings caged us into their winding, narrow cobblestone streets as if they were going to sneak in closer and closer til they completely locked us in, never to allow us to leave.
We rang the doorbell of the first guesthaus (Chris recognized it immediately even though it had to have been at least 7 years since he last stayed there), and waited. And waited. For whatever reason on that Tuesday at 348pm, it was closed. The windows were dark and the insides of the home looked peaceful and untouched. I wondered how long it had been unvisited. How dusty. How cold. The door was beautiful wood. Strong and thick- the sound of knocking would have been entirely absorbed into the ancient wood. The doorbell was an old sounding buzzer that you could hear ringing as long as you held your finger down. It was apparent no amount of buzzing- short bursts of multiple rings or obnoxiously long held rings- would bring someone to the door to grant us shelter. We had to keep walking to find another place to stay. Chris told me he knew of another hotel up ahead but it was about a 2 mile walk further. The air was very cold and it had started to rain. Our packs were uncomfortably heavy. It was hard to enjoy the adorable town we were trekking through. The houses were all so old. Old doors. Fascinating windows and walls. The streets were one car width. One house could easily see into the next they were so close. We saw 2 people. The entire 3 mile walk. 2.
We saw a beautiful cemetery with a stone wall wrapping around it like big protective arms. Every so many feet the wall would have a slight tower with a figurine of Jesus or Mary or some other biblical scene set in a cubby like hole behind iron bars. The headstones were very decorative. Some were taller than myself. Some looked like mini castles themselves. We walked so far and our feet and backs hurt so much by the time we reached the end of the town and the only real hotel there.
We went to the door and it was locked. I refused to let that dishearten me, so I suggested we try talking to the people at the restaurant to see about how to book a room. We caught the waitress and inquired. She didn't know much English, but enough to tell us her hotel was full. No rooms. I couldn't help my eyes from tearing up a bit. Chris had warned if this hotel was full he didn't know that we would find a place to sleep at all. The town is nearly shut down in the winter because the castle nearby is closed. Tourists pour in all summer while tours allow guests to view the insides of the historic attraction. We sat at a table outside on the deck of the restaurant to gather our wits and try to rest a bit. It was our own fault. We definitely should have booked a room and researched the area when we knew it was such a small town with limited resources. There wasn't even a grocery market or another restaurant that we saw of in the town. On our walk we had witnessed only one tiny church, an abandoned warehouse or factory of sorts (which had we been in better spirits would have considered exploring that haunting, intriguing place) and rows and rows of houses. We didn't have much choice but to head back into town and see if there were any other bed and breakfast type houses to rent a room from. The road back into town was slim and winding through the woods. The hotel was located a bit outside of town at the mouth of the trail leading to the main attraction Burg Eltz Castle. We walked along the path trying to keep hope that we would not have to sleep in the sorry example of a train station. I told Chris I was going to hitchhike. He said he didn't know that a thumbs up was a universal sign for getting someone to pick you up or if that was an American thing. I did it anyway. A few cars passed with no luck. I didn't have much time to think about what I was doing. I was cold, wet and so tired; in fear of having no place to stay for the night. Another car sped by us. Another headed in our direction. I wasn't giving up, “I'll hold my thumb out till we are on the other side of town,” I thought. The next car relieved me of that promise. It stopped. The guy, looking to be about our age, spoke something in German. We spoke back in English. He admitted he knew a bit of English. We told him in as few straight forward words as we could that we needed a place to stay. He said, “oh! I will help you. I drive you to every guesthaus and help you find one. I wait and drive til you find one." This guy was instantly my hero. He had a bucket of soup sitting on his front seat. I offered to hold it in the back seat while Chris slid into the front seat. This guy's soup smelled so weird. I was definitely hoping I didn't spill it on myself. I couldn't place the herbs or seasoning that would have been used to make it smell so.....confusing. It was a combination of sweet and musty and.....something else. Like a casserole. Baked mixture of tons of foods melting together. At one point while we zoomed around the narrow curves of the road he called back asking about his soup. I felt as if I owed it to him to keep it safe and in tact. So, I tried extra hard to balance it while we bumped and swerved along. We arrived at the first bed and breakfast and he got out of his car quicker than Chris. He rang the doorbell and even spoke on our behalf to the resident who seemed not to speak English at all. He told them we were desperate and they seemed as though they were going to turn us away from the way the conversation was going. After a short time of discussion, they invited us in. The savior explained they wouldn't cook us dinner, though. I wished we knew enough German to say how unnecessary it would be to have them cook us dinner when all we were praying for was just a warm bed instead of a frozen shack. Besides, we had sandwiches we bought at the last train station with civilization. We said our goodbyes to the kind stranger so quickly to enter the new place saving our butts due to being overwhelmed with gratitude. Gratitude extending both directions- to our savior and the guesthaus owners. The old couple who owned the house asked us to wait in their dining room while they fixed up our room.
We sat enjoying the heat, enjoying the relieved weight from our backs and aching feet. We soaked in the atmosphere of someone else's home. Their fireplace. Their window coverings so overly pink with lace along the bottom. The decorations were like any grandparents’ home would look. Antiques, odd glass figurines and bottles and floral furniture. It was cozy. Delightful. Endearing. When our room was ready they handed us the keys. A skeleton key was for our main door. A fantastic little silver lining to the whole day, if you ask me. It was authentic, not like some cheeky souvenir. This house is probably that old. The town is, obviously. The adorable old woman led us to our room. It was up a flight or creaky dark wooden stairs and down an even creakier hallway. Our room was also very creaky. Old wood floors wishing their hundreds of years of work were over. But nevertheless still doing their job. Our room was Orange. The bedding, the lighting, the wood. Very Orange. It was cute though. It was also very cold. Another sign they weren't expecting guests. I hoped the small ancient heating register attached to the wall in the far corner would be enough to heat the room fairly quickly. We had a chill deep inside that would not easily warm. A hot shower would help if the heating element didn't kick in fast enough. The bathroom was nothing to write about. Normal. Clean. After scanning the room in momentary awe and thankfulness, we began to settle in. And by that I mean we quickly stripped ourselves of all wet clothing, turned the heat up as high as could go and snuggled up under the covers.
The bed(s) was actually two twin beds pushed together (which I found along the trip to be the norm in Europe) . We had two separate blankets both twin sized. Chris was excited about this as he has threatened many nights that we should venture into this method of sleeping. He accuses me of sleeping like some kind of wild thing, thrashing and stealing covers. I consider his accusations a bit dramatic. My only request is that I can swaddle my feet in enough covers to find little cold spots for my toes. I hate being too hot at night. If he had it his way, we would have separate twin beds and his sheets and blankets would be so tightly tucked into all sides that he nearly mummifies overnight. Ick. Anyway, he was happy at the arrangement (until later when he got too cold). After all the excitement had subsided and the safety of a real place to sleep became present in our bodies to let down the survival-mode gates I realized how hungry I was. I remembered the sandwiches I had been carting around since Duisburg. I had the hunger pangs motivating me to search our room for where I had flung the bag in our whirlwind of events. I tore apart our room in search, with no luck. I admitted to Chris there was a nearly 100% chance I had left the bag of sandwiches along with my water in the savior's car. Excitement is the number one thing that causes me to become absent minded of things I had been so heavily focused on just minutes before. Damn! I really wanted that sandwich! Quite a bit, really. I wasn't already taking for granted the warmth of a room, so I conceded that going to bed hungry was significantly better than the earlier option of homelessness. We talked for a bit. Huddled under the covers still waiting for heat to fill the room. We recounted the day and how lucky we were. We felt so blessed. A good half hour, if not more, had passed as we chartered on about the trip and the lessons learned that day. Soon, we heard voices downstairs. Chris jokingly said, "bet that's our friend with your sandwich." I punched his arm. He really wasn't all that hungry so he had no care about the lost food. “I doubt! But thanks for the reminder that I'm still hungry!" Not a minute past his sarcastic jest, a knock came at our door. I hopped up and opened it. Savior! It was actually our friend, with our sandwiches! He looked so happy to bring them to us. "I think you want these. I brought them back to you. And, I bring you a present. A very good wine made from here. Please have it."
I have had a wonderful life of blessings and moments that overwhelm me to the point of feeling removed from reality. This will always be remembered as one of them. I teared up with overwhelming gratitude. (Tearing up twice in one day within a matter of hours even, is not normal for me- I’m no baby!) Forget the sandwich I wanted so badly. This wasn't about stupid bread and meat slapped together meant to satisfy a stomach. This was about a guy so thoughtful that after being willing to hunt down lodging for us went out of his way AGAIN to return to us something we had foolishly left behind. He didn't have to. Who knows how far he lived from where we were staying. Who knows if he worked all day and was looking forward to a hot bowl of stinky soup in his home. He had to of gotten all the way home before noticing the bag I left in his backseat. How tempting it would have been to just throw them away and settle in for the evening. But here Savior was, standing in our doorway with our food AND a gift. A gift?? Why? We were a burden, shouldn't we have gifted him with something? If we had anything of interest, we would have. We wanted to. So badly we wished we had a way to show him how grateful we were. I gave him a hug. Chris awkwardly outstretched his hand to shake Savior’s hand while staying under the covers since he was only in his boxers. We said our 2nd set of goodbyes to this incredibly kind man. He left and I scurried back to bed. I was going to eat that sandwich. It was a magical sandwich now. It had sentiment as well as nutrition. It would be well savored, not scarfed. We again recounted the incredible blessing, as if retelling it showed our deep appreciation. We tossed out ideas of how we could track him down and how we would thank him. We realized, we never asked his name. We were so caught up in his kindness, we didn't even think of it. We had resolved that we would ask our hosts of they knew of him and we planned to send him something cool like Rogue beer or Willamette Valley wine. We wanted to spend even more time talking about the whole ordeal, stretching out the moment as long as possible so as to never forget. We went to bed that night so happy and full and warm. Even now I want to keep talking about it, as if there is more I can say to explain to you the very impact Savior had on us. But there are no other words for it but the ones I've already said. It was. That is that. But I tell you, I prayed that night that God would greatly bless that man. Greatly.